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Wednesday

It’s easy to lose all sense of time and yet feel every minute ticking away–wanting to make this time worthwhile. It’s a good thing the hotel room is small and somewhat cramped. It makes me want to get out there, even though the weather is cold and rainy.

Still–I’m going to put on my brave face, get myself together and enjoy the day. So what about the expectations of anyone else. So what that he is a poor communicator, decision-maker and driver in unfamiliar surroundings.? I just wish he could make his intentions more clear. We will find some breakfast and venture out. Last night was marked by confusion after dinner at The Loving Hut. We got lost on our way home.


Later in the day

Rain. Cold. Windblown. The constant cold drizzle. Depressed. Disappointed. Sad, confused, lost. So much lovely scenery we can’t even photograph due to the constant cold and rain. I took a few photos on the St. John’s bridge with the cold rain beating against my face. We went out to buy rain jackets, $80 each.

Everything’s not so cool in the city’s downtown proper. The one-way streets are confusing, the bus lines intersect with bike and pedestrian lanes. It’s all so hectic and chaotic during the daytime.

Thursday

I woke up depressed. It’s 6:30 a.m. I am sitting on the bathroom floor with my coffee. I don’t want to disturb him. He’s still in bed. I can’t deny my disappointment in this trip so far. Can I just move into my depression and stay there instead of artificially pumping myself up? I am hungry and there’s no decent food around here. The next trip I plan will be better. I am very sorry now that I planned this. He is a bore. Can I just accept the way I feel? The internal censor says “No, you are not allowed to feel that way. You are the one who put this thing together.”

My stomach is angry, growling, mad. I should go downstairs and order an omelet. Forget this stupid veganism. I am here for what I came for, though. I am in the vegan Mecca of the country. This is what I’m here for. I did not make plans for the other stuff in between meals. That was his plan, with all his gear and such.

I got to go to Proper Eats and Sweet Pea Bakery and Blossoming Lotus and Loving Hut. We had whole wheat pizza crust from Hot Lips. We did some walking in a lovely suburb and took some great pictures there. I will take more great pictures of MY subject. Forget about Mount Hood and the rose gardens. That doesn’t interest me anyway.

We are going to find the barbecue food truck for lunch and Dovetail Bakery for breakfast. It’s going to be MY day. Yesterday was a bust. We tried to go to Washington Park after St. John’s bridge. The rain and cold were too much to take. We came back to the hotel and ordered a pizza and watched Mad Men on the laptop. Oh, boy. Just like home.

I bought a bottle of wine at Fred Meyer and we had a real junk food night. We never went back out after that. I spent the rest of the evening on the computer reading about Portland and watching YouTube videos about Portland. They are all sunny. Why torture myself? I am going to make the best of this day once again.

To be continued…

 

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